Keepin' the Juices Going

Never fear, Melville has not been lost at sea, but rather is mired in the belly of a far more fearful fish – swarms of essays…and they are particularly biting this year.  (Oh, I crack myself up!)

While Wollstonecraft draws her abundant energy for research and doctoral applications from her beloved Milton, I, too, have been spending the last few weeks being reinvigorated by an outpouring of creativity. 

As a teacher, sometimes it is difficult to take personal inspiration from my class discussions.  After all, while I am trained to “plumb the depths” in my studies – of literature and, often by extension, my own life – I am constantly reminded that my students are still learning the basics of analysis and cannot fully journey with me yet.  They are perfectly complacent skimming the surface of the content because that is all they have ever really done and all that has ever been expected of them.  So: how do I reverse that classic Stones song and get my satisfaction?  How do I find those moments that keep me jazzed?

I’ve talked before on “Thrice Booked” about the need to focus on the little moments in teaching and my careful scrutiny has really been rewarding this semester.  I’ve been delighted by some flashes of insights from students that I tuck away for those low moments.  My favorite so far:  a student who professed to hate reading and got off to a bit of a slow start but then discovered her passion for drama.  Who knew? 

But besides those moments, I keep hearing over and over that the best teachers are those who keep learning and stretching themselves, so I’ve been making a concerted effort this year to not shut down my own growth as I teach.

Here’s what’s kept me going (outside of the books!) this semester and kept me thinking:

-- Mondo Guerra from Season 8 of “Project Runway” – I am the first to admit that I cried when he revealed that he is living HIV+ after years of keeping his diagnosis a secret.  What astonished me was that in the midst of all his own emotional angst he kept going and created yet another beautifully quirky outfit each week.  I was continually struck by his ability to reach deep within his creative well and create something entirely different from the rest of the designers with color, pattern, and, frankly, a lot of joy.  Most importantly to me was his ability to take inspiration from the simplest, most everyday ideas but see them in an entirely fresh and playful way.  To riff off an old cliché, Mondo makes some damn fierce limoncello from a life of lemons. 

-- “Giselle” the ballet – I hadn’t been to the ballet in years and I was reminded once again of the inherent beauty of art.  I spent years studying art history but to see art in motion is another experience entirely.  When I was little, I was fascinated by ballet but I also balked at the ruthlessness of dance as it slowly breaks down one’s body (and one’s feet!)  However, this effort is even more valuable for the cost of time, energy, and effort that these dancers exert to show the fascinating possibilities of our bodies to help express ourselves.      

-- The SF Giants: Now, granted, I am a Northern California girl who has spent her share of summer afternoons sitting in the Stick eating chocolate malts and now at AT&T park gulping down some of those mouth-watering garlic fries.  In a weird way, I connect baseball with Walt Whitman’s “everyman” poetry – the joy of the time outdoors, the songs for the local teams, the thrill of a home run getting lost in the stadium lights.  The world of baseball is bigger than any ballpark because the games and the players’ stories have become the poetry of the people.  In fact, my favorite episode of my favorite show of all time involves Chris Stevens of “Northern Exposure” reciting his version of “Casey at the Bat” out in the Alaskan snow.  For Chris, appreciating literature is like that moment in the snowstorm as you play out “Casey” and you feel the drama reaching off the page.

So, like every Giants’ fan, I spent October and the start of November dying from torture but also bursting with pride as I sounded more than a few Whitman-esque yawps over the rooftops.  The Giants especially have all the makings of a legend that will only grow after this year – after all, they were a team of underdogs, rookies, and veterans who had their fair share of personal disappointments (not to mention a long Series draught for the team).  But the Gigantes’ appeal also lies in their ability not to take themselves too seriously and to just be themselves.  From the rally thong to the long hair to that ridiculously fabulous beard, they were out there to have fun and see how far they could advance as a team.  These members were not following some corporate agenda but rather they reminded us of those bygone hometown, homegrown teams -- best exalted by the simple joy for the game from their broadcasters Kruk and Kuip.  I could go on but I think nothing says it better than their unofficial theme song – “Don’t stop believing.”  Well, that, and the inevitable: Fear the Beard. 

Of course, these examples may not seem like much, but when you are looking for that indescribable flash, for joy, for the possibilities of poetry in the everyday, you can find inspiration just about anywhere you look deeply enough.  I’ve needed those moments of recharging energy to keep me and that classroom buzzing.  And these sparks of creativity and human possibility have led to some great progress in my own reading, writing, and crafting.  But more on that later…I’ve got some grading to do.